I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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