Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
