This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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