Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
