The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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