Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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