What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
