your room smells of hookers.
And success
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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