but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
