I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
