oh god the rape fog is back!
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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