break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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