I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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