Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
