i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
