took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
