I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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