We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
