just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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