at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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