Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
