these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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