she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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