Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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