one might say we're banned from that church
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
