I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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