Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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