saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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