If that was your dad, he is hot
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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