you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
