it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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