I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
