May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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