How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
