Christians are straight up FREAKS
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
