I wish life had little blips of pornography
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm experimenting with sincerity
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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