she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
