I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
