I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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