why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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