Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
