What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
