Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
