BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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