He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
