No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
