He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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