I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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