do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
We have started to decorate penises.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
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