I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
